Reflections of Me....
>> Thursday, December 10, 2009
*Alternate Post Title: Reflections ON Me....
I recently read a post that rang so true, that it really got me thinking. The post, with such powers? Find it HERE. It wasn't the wassail recipe. Although, I have every intention of giving it a try. It was the remarks about once being eager (I believe she used the word anxious) to please our husbands with our domestic abilities, and the truth that having kids in a short about of time "can wipe the fun right out of you".
Man, oh man, how true those words are!
There are many days, that I look in the mirror, and can't even begin to recognize the person looking back at me. I've changed so much. Not so much physically. Who am I kidding, I've changed in many ways physically. But I digress. Emotionally, mentally and physically. I am not that 19 year old girl, who once marched down the aisle to her awaiting groom.
Nor am I the woman, I thought I had become, after several years of marriage. Because it was at that time I began having children. My first 'born' while I was only 24. Which was followed by my first born son at 25 and my baby at 26.
I have since cleared the ripe old age of 29 and am headed to my 30's. Long lost are the days that I spent creating in the kitchen, wowing my husband with my culinary creations. The days of a good solid meal, a distant memory. There is so much to be done, and so many counting on me, that one must schedule time for 'Fun'.
Like many, our evening meals -at times, consist of mac 'n cheese, hotdogs, or something purchased. Nothing to be proud of. But, certainly nothing I am ashamed of.
At the end of the day, is there room for improvement? You bet! But, I remind myself that I am not the 19 year old self, that I once was. I have the stretch marks and life experience to prove it. And, I'm okay with this fact.
The truth is, I have yet to figure out (entirely) who I am, now -although I like to think I'm getting close. That being the case, I can't commit to going back, until I decide if the NOW version of me is worth giving up!
16 Pepsi Points :
this is a great post...
and in the beginning i thought to to wow my husband with my domestic abilities... then i realized i sorta just did NOT like domesticity.. at all... so now..
he does a large part of the cooking, i clean up the kitchen.. and we clean the house together... it is what it is...
and we are all who we are, and cant help if we want to be true to our self!!!
I often feel like I'm still 20. I don't want to be 20, but I can't believe that I'm a grown up.
FANTASTIC post!
I don't want to grow up. meeeh
I told my husband up front that I was not a Suzi Homemaker and not to get any notion that I ever would be. LOL
I love this post, I've been realizing lately, that I feel different too. I am more ok with me, physically and mentally. I am having an easier time accepting who I am and learning to love me. I think this is what they talk about on t.v. when they say older women know themselves better. (I don't think I'm Older, I'm 34, but I don't feel like a kid anymore, and I kinda like it.)
I still don't feel grownup. At the age of 34 with four kids to raise I still believe I'm 19. Then sometimes I'll get a glimpse of someone who is really 19 and I realize, yup, I'm 34.
Just wait until you're nearing 40 like me. It gives you a whole other prespective.
This is a very good post! Very thought provoking!
he does a large part of the cooking, i clean up the kitchen.. and we clean the house together... it is what it is...
Work from home India
These are great thoughts. I actually never thought I would cook, and now I actually make meals! It's so interesting to see what we "thought" we would be doing when we first got married, and what we are actually doing now.
Such great reflections! It's so interesting to consider what I was like at 19 when I got married. I remember actually telling my husband that I was excited to do his laundry. What in the world? Haha. No no I still love doing things for him.
i don't have kids, but I do know the feeling of not quite knowing who you are anymore. But I do have to say, that there's a 19 year old in all of us still! at least that how I've always felt.
Thanks for the shout out!
I am completely different that the woman I thought I would turn out to be. And I guess its a good thing, mostly good, some bad.
This is actually one of the reasons I haven't been blogging as much lately...I spent way too much time on the computer and not enough doing the things I used to do (like make sure there was clean underwear). I'm trying just a little to be better...
Very thoughtful post, I really appreciate the trials and journey, I still have my goofy 19 y/o in me, alongside the 48 y/o who is more tempered and kind, mostly to myself.
Post a Comment